The following is from Bill Rayl, the man who built the original Sixty area, later called Amazing Instant Novelist. Bill and Marx had a mutual respect for one another, and I know Marx would be honored to know Bill saved some of his writings for all of these years.

We thank you, Bill, for all you did for Marx and so many of us --

Marx Prewett was a wonderfully gifted person who had a knack for making other people laugh, even when he wasn't feeling particularly humorous or upbeat. To hear from you that Marx had passed away was a shock.

People may not remember the "Important Letter from Steve" missives that would be sent regularly from AOL to all subscribers, to keep them updated on the latest policy changes, feature additions, etc. When AOL changed their rates with practically no advanced warning, the AOL community got up in arms. The fact that all of this happened leading up to April Fools Day that year was just too much for Marx to pass up.

When initially released (via e-mail on AOL), this letter made quite a stir and even got the Instant Novelist area into a bit of hot water with the AOL Powers That Be (or used to be, anyway). Marx was good at that...his "Celebrity Indian Names" contest caused a huge uproar with the Native American online crowd and sparked a great deal of debate and discussion.

I've kept a copy of Marx's Steve Case Letter on my computer all these years and I reread it every now and then. It's not the funniest thing Marx ever wrote, but it embodies Marx's spirit of challenging authority and his uncanny ability to make a serious point through humor. For me, it's symbolic of the good things we were all attempting to do in that crazy America Online world to mentor writers, support free expression, etc. It didn't always work, but when it did it was special. And Marx made it work more often than not.

Bill 

=*=*=*=*=
"Win hearts, and you have all men's hands and purses."
--William Cecil, Lord Burleigh
 

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Please Read this Important Letter from Steve:

 

Dear Community Member,

 

Lately, a few of you have voiced frustration with having trouble signing on to AOL. While this is an isolated problem, let me assure you, the Community Member, that we here at AOL are aware of this situation and we are working several hours a week to take steps to correct it. In order for you to better understand the obstacles we are up against, I'd like to explain what has happened.

 

Recently, the monthly cost of an AOL account went from $9.95 per month for five hours and $2.95 for each additional hour to a flat $19.95 per month for unlimited use. The problem is when we said "unlimited," people took that to mean that they could use it as much as they wanted. What we actually meant was "don't be a pig about it." When Community Members all try to use something they are paying for, it's bound to cause problems, so we really aren't a bit surprised that you whining greedheads are crying like you've been slapped across the face with a hand full of horseshoes. Perhaps a closer look at the problem will ease your minds and make you shut your pieholes for a few minutes.

 

Let's say "Johnny" had ten apples. He promised one apple to each one of eight million friends in exchange for three grapes each. All eight million friends accepted the offer. "Johnny" found that he now had a buttload of grapes, but each of his friends expected the apple that they'd been promised. "Johnny" went to his associate "Juan" and asked what he'd do if he ("Juan") was in "Johnny's" predicament.

 

"Juan," a long-time mass-media guru ("I want my Oranges") suggested that "Johnny" take his grapes and board a train that would leave Vienna, Virginia, at eight AM and travel west at 79 MPH for eighty-five hours. "Johnny" saw this as a good suggestion and acted accordingly, also taking along his close friends "Megan," "Shirley," and "Kihm Lho," none of whom were huge grape fans but had no designs on "Johnny's" apples.

 

There. Can you see what we here at AOL are up against? We're not magicians and when we sent out those billions of free AOL diskettes we had no idea that people would actually use them. We were merely marketing as heavily as possible and it looks like it makes a few of you whiners unhappy.

 

Since this so-called "problem" didn't happen overnight, the solution won't either. In the meantime, here are a few suggestions to help you endure this frustrating period until we correct the problem or you drop your account:

 

* Don't sign on during prime usage hours (3 AM-1:45 AM)
* Don't sign on during off-hours (1:46 AM-2:59 AM)
* Buy a new modem (see Keyword: AOL Store)
* Put a brick in your toilet tank
* Obey all posted speed limits
* Chew each bite twenty-five times
* Wear clean underwear in case you get in an accident
* Check the batteries in your smoke alarm. Replace if necessary
* Never fly kites in thunderstorms or near electric wires
* Save plastic bleach bottles and create lovely decorative craft items from them
* Pick up a telephone and call a friend
* Take a youth fishing
* Spend some time reading to an illiterate
* Use the US Postal Service instead of e-mail. If moving, notify the postmaster with your forwarding address at least two weeks in advance
* Read a book
* Keep out of reach of children
* Do not operate heavy equipment if using over-the-counter medications

 

As you can see, these are all things that you, the Community Member, can do to help each other through this difficult time. Should you decide you'd rather curse the darkness than light a candle, it's no skin off my khaki-clad butt. I already have all the grapes that I'll ever need.

Have a nice day.

 

Steve

 

PS: OK, we confess. This isn't really an actual letter from Steve Case. This little bit of humor, written by NOVL Dime, is brought to you courtesy of the Humor Dept. of the Amazing Instant Novelist area on AOL. This concludes our test of the Emergency Instant Humor System, If this had been a real Steve Case letter, you would have been informed on where to dial in your local area (though you'd probably just get a busy signal